People Who May Have Been Flirting with Me: The Roads Not Taken

Having recently come to the end of stunted, disappointing romantic relationship, I find myself drifting back and lingering on “what might have been.” Specifically, reviewing all the times people flirted with me, but I didn't realize it until many moons later, because I am oblivious and suspicious of the motives of everyone who talks to me. Literally months later I would think about these interactions and think, “Wait, what?” I'm pretty slow about everything. I am also this way with feeling angry. I get mad about stuff like years after it happens. I am just now feeling outraged about the cancellation of "Firefly." We should really get a petition going.


Dan
I think this guy's name was Dan. I feel like every guy I knew in college was named Dan. One time I did not remember someone from a party and he called me on it, but I correctly guessed that his name was Dan. Who didn't remember who now, other Dan who this anecdote is not even about?

This Dan was maybe trying to hook up with a girl in the dorm room next to mine. I don't really remember. But our friendship was borne of him constantly passing by my door. He used to make fun of how ridiculous my then-boyfriend was (2 tru, Dan. 2 tru), who was a proto-foodie and obsessed with Bob Dylan and an exercise bulimic and had recently lost a lot of weight after looking exactly like Rosie O'Donnell.