First of all, I love being Canadian. It's super neat! Secondly, Canadians are really fucking annoying.
I could end this "column" there and feel satisfied, but in true annoying Canadian style let me expound on this statement of absolute truth. Let me elucidate, enlighten and enspire you. My goal is to offer you, my non-Canadian monster friends, the tools necessary to communicate with and appreciate your enigmatic Northern cousins.
But before I get into what makes Canadians so fucking annoying, I think the first thing we need to do is acknowledge the elephant in the room. By ignoring that elephant we give it power, and no one likes powerful elephants. I'm talking of course, about the "Celebrity Scoop" sketch from this weekend's episode of SNL. If you are an American in America you can watch the clip over here, but since Hulu discriminates against foreigners I can't even get a link to embed the video. Thankfully it's on youtube. Hold on kids, this one is super high def:
