"But Lawblog," you may ask, "Doesn't C3PO get enough shit from Star Wars fans? Isn't he widely regarded as a useless and annoying albatross? Doesn't he even annoy this girl? Isn't Boba Fett awesome?" The answer to all of these questions is yes, however, in regards to the last question, if you're going to Comic Con, try to find a more creative costume. I am specifically calling bullshit on the one thing that C3PO is supposedly useful for, namely his position as a protocol droid.
A protocol droid's functions are to serve as a translator, from sentient beings to computers and from one sentient being to another. Let us address the function of translation from sentient being to computer first. Where should I begin with that one? How about with the fact that he doesn't do that? At all? In fact, it seems as though his only job in this regard is to yell at R2D2 to do things more quickly, such as shutting down all the trash compactors on the detention level, or jerry-rigging the blast doors at the alliance base on Endor. In fact, if it weren't for R2D2's ability to interface with those computers, the rebel alliance would have been royally fucked.
In regards to translation from sentient being to sentient being, C3PO is immensely proud of his talents, and is not averse to bragging.
He is, "Fluent in over six million forms of communication." According to the dictionary, "fluent" is described as "able to speak or write smoothly, easily, or readily." Witness the following exchange from Return of the Jedi:
