R.I.P. Your Productivity: The Post That Launched A Thousand Unemployments

 Hello everybody! Welcome to the first official post of R.I.P. Your Productivity (see first semi-official post here). I am going to make sure that you never work again (Note: this is a lie) by providing you with entertainment, information and other bitlets. Let's do it (TWSS)!


FOR YOUR BRAIN (ELEPHANTINE EDITION)

Elephant Quest
The newest game in the ridiculously long elephant series (there are a few more games but they aren't as good). While technically, these aren't really part of a "series" (not including the direct sequels), they all contain the same elephant hero so good enough for me. I picked Elephant Quest as the main game because a) it is new and b) OMG ADORBZ! All these should keep you busy for a while so I will move on now (I am Mayor of Segueville. Can you tell?).

FOR YOUR EARS
The songs I have chosen this week all have a theme in that they all have absolutely cramazing videos.The songs are all great and Me approved but do yourself a favour and don't watch them in teeny, tiny squint-o-vision.

Esben and the Witch - Marching Song
A little warning: this video is, as I said before, fantastic. It is very simple and creepy and it sets the mood really well. However, it is a pretty rough watch and if you are easily upset DO NOT WATCH IT. There is no violence in it but there is some blood so I can't say whether it is NSFW or not. If you don't mind any of this though, watch it! It's so good!

 Baths - Lovely Bloodflow
This video is just plain pretty and has some of my favourite use of colour I've ever seen in a music video. The album Cerulean is out now and is super good. One of my favourites in 2010.

15 to 20 - The Phenomenal Handclap Band 
An extremely slick and stylish video that appears to pay tribute to 70s heist or getaway films (I wouldn't know, I wasn't alive back then). Whoops, I meant to write FART BARF UGH.

FOR YOUR EYES

This is extremely untimely and I would not be surprised if everyone has already seen this but it is hilarious!

Oh no, we are all dead from cuteness. Hi Angels!


So that's all for now. Tell me how I did or any ideas you have to make this column better in the comments.

And, as always, R.I.P. your productivity.

Note: Please don't get fired because of this. I'm serious. That would be terrible.