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Saturday, January 15, 2011

I'd Hit That: Football Edition

In this very special edition of "I'd Hit That," we are going to countdown the the top 5 hottest football players. I took your comments into account, and I also added my own football hotties. Let's do this!

5.) Tom Brady

Ok, so Tom Brady is a douche and plays for my (and my husband, The Narrator's) least favorite team, The New England Patriots. However, I can't overlook the amount of hotness this guy possesses. It's kind of unreal. Since Tom is a douche, I would "hate-fuck" him and then that's it...GET OUT OF MY BED, TOM!

4.) Jake Delhomme

Jake Delhomme is the former quarterback for the Carolina Panthers and the current quarterback for the Cleveland Browns. To top it all off, he is from my home state of Louisiana and used to play for my favorite team the New Orleans Saints. Dude is definitely a cutie and I would love to kiss his face. This one is for you, Baby Friday!

3.) Reggie Bush

Reggie Bush plays for my team, the New Orleans Saints. WHO DAT! He is especially hot when he actually catches a pass and makes the down (Ya burnt, Reggie!). Oh, Reggie, your face is so beautiful...Wait...have you guys seen Reggie without a shirt?! Check this out:

HOLY MACKEREL! What a body! HEEEEEEYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!

2.) Drew Brees

Obviously, I am being extremely biased in this post. But this is my blog post and I can do what I want! So, Drew Brees, quarterback for the New Orleans Saints. Where do I start? This man is handsome, one of the best athletes ever (yes, EVER!), he does so much for New Orleans, and he just seems like an all-around super nice guy that we would all like to take home to meet the parents. All these things make him very doable. Did I mention that he is a total DILF?:

1.) Ryan Gosling

You weren't expecting that, were you?! You've been had, motherfuckers! MUHAHAHA!

Don't forget that Ryan has played a football player in two movies (The Slaughter Rule and Remember the Titans), so I think he more than qualifies for this list. After all, he is the hottest man of all time. ALL TIME!


  1. I did not see #1 coming, which means that I should definitely go back to detective school.

  2. I am not sure who any of these men are, but Jake Delhomme is the only one who has he decency to hide his veiny hands from me. So I pick him.

  3. At first, I was gonna be mad because Peyton Manning didn't make the cut. But Ryan Gosling (my boyfriend BTW) makes up for that 10 million-fold.

  4. Lula, consider this my official challenge to a cat fight.

  5. Um where is Sean Astin as Daniel E. "Rudy" Ruettiger?

  6. This made me laugh so hard at 8am this morning, I nearly woke up the two other hungover monsters sleeping in my hotel room. Brilliant. (and NO you may not have more details than that)