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Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Gums of Our Lives: Season 1 recap

Don’t you hate it when you’re waiting for the season finale of a show but instead they do a recap episode? BOOM!
The story begins in the house of Thisismynightmare and The Narrator, the former of whom is unhappy in her marriage because the latter spends all of his time in his basement laboratory after he was dismissed from the University of Internet Science and Blog Technology. She decides to leave him for her eflirt, Just Desserts, at the urging of her therapist, Dr. Principal Enchman.
On the way out of the house she gets a phone call from her sister, Baby Friday, who informs her that her husband, Teacherman, was at the University when there was an explosion, and now she can’t find him. Thisismynightmare decides not to go to Just Desserts, but rather visit her sister. They go to the police station, where Detective Werttrew shows them the remains of Teacherman’s trademark tweed jacket. They are sad.
Meanwhile, in the basement laboratory, The Narrator is finishing work on his most diabolical creation yet: The Winbot. He goes to tell his wife, but finds her missing. In response he unleashes the Winbot to find and troll her.

Worried that she had missed her appointment without calling, Dr. Principal Enchman set off to find Thisismynightmare, enlisting the help of a hard-drinking private detective, A Serious Monster. Upon returning to his office, he finds two agents and lovers, Huckabeast and Cakeordeath. In exchange for any information they had about The Narrator, they would tell him the location of his lost, thought-dead paramour, LilBobbyTables.
Just Desserts was preparing to greet Thisismynightmare when he was attacked by the Winbot. He manages to escape using his awesome dance skills and zooms away on his motorcycle. He meets up with his tech-savvy friend, Paper Street Soap Company, and his weapons dealer, KajusX, to get equipped to fight the Winbot and find Thisismynightmare.
After Teacherman’s funeral, eulogized beautifully by father Mans, Thisismynightmare and BabyFriday get together with two other members of the Super Exclusive Best Friends Exclusive Club; Briadru4 and TheKelburrows. They proceed to drink heavily, when all of a sudden they are interrupted by the return of Teacherman. He is bleeding heavily from the head and doesn’t seem to recognize anyone, so TheKelburrows carries him and BabyFriday to the car and they drive to the hospital. Thisismynightmare and Briadru4 stay in the house.
While doing research on The Narrator and Thisismynightmare, A Serious Monster is interrupted by a phone call from a shady figure claiming to have information. She goes to meet him, and finds Facetaco, a half human/half taco created by The Narrator in his lab. She follows him into the sewer and finds a group of other Narrator-created hybrids: Polythene Pam, R2D2 Esquire, and Girlphilosopher. They are planning to take down the Narrator and also make really bad puns all of the time. A Serious Monster agrees to help them, so they set off in the sewers to confront the Narrator.
In the hospital, BabyFriday learns from their doctor, Doctor Doctor Girlfriend, that Teacherman has amnesia, and probably will take some time remembering everything. They also find out that his hospital bills are being paid by a mysterious benefactor.
Back at the Teacherfriday house, Thisismynightmare and Briadru4 are startled by a knock at the door. It is the Winbot! He kidnaps them and stuffs them in a white van.
BabyFriday, The Kelburrows, and Teacherman come home to find their house broken into and their skeledog smashed to pieces. Officer Superglue, the first responder, tells them that they should find a safe place to stay. Also that BabyFriday is smoking hot. Teacherman suggests the University, so they pile into a car, unaware that they are now being tailed by a maroon Cadillac.
Dr. Principal Enchman and Agents Cakeordeath and Huckabeast go to the Agency headquarters, where they are greeted by Sergeant Duncan and Capu Flapu and the Spasmatic Pentagrams, two members of the Royal Lorry Force, from England. They inform Dr. Principal Enchman that LilBobbyTables was an undercover operative for them, but defected when she fell in love. They are about to reveal her location when they are alerted by an alarm. They flee to the underground tunnels, where they are greeted by the evil Chris Trash, who has tripped the alarm so that he can steal a microchip to make the dreaded MacGuffin device. He holds everyone hostage while Cakeordeath retrieves the chip. After obtaining it, Chris Trash disappears, leaving behind a bomb. Capu Flapu valiantly sacrifices himself so that the others can escape.
Briadru4 and Thisismynightmare wake up in the back of the van. When it pulls to a stop they are able to escape by kicking open the door into the Winbot’s face. They find themselves lost in the woods, when Thisismynightmare finds a fruit basket. She grabs it and the two of them are ensnared in a trap. They are taken by two yokels, Fozzy the Chair and Dusky Panther, to a cabin in the woods, where their matriarch, Mountains Beyond Mountains, lives.
Teacherman, The Kelburrows, and BabyFriday arrive at the University, where they are greeted by a very surprised and flirtatious Dr. Gobblegirl. Hoping that seeing his old research will jog his memory, Teacherman suggests they go to the archives. As they are about to access his data, a shadowy figure appears, holding a gun.
Dr. Principal Enchman, Sergeant Duncan, and Agents Cakeordeath and Huckabeast track Chris Trash to a warehouse in the warehouse district. They bust in the door, and find that Chris Trash is not there, but rather his partner, Ephcee. She manages to escape to the roof into a helicopter piloted by Trash. They follow up to the roof, and Huckabeast launches himself at the runners.
NEXT WEEK: Will Just Desserts reach them in time? Will Huckabeast bring down the helicopter? Will the hybrids defeat The Narrator? Who is at the door? What’s in the box? Where’s my baybay? WAAAAAAAAAAAALT?!?!?!
*I promise that none of the answers are “They were dead the whole time” or “The whispers are just people who died with unfinished business”

7 comments:

  1. Thanks for the recap LB! I'm no longer out of the GOOL-OOP. (boooooooo)

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  2. What's in the baaaaaahhhhhcccckkkkkksss??

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  3. Few things in life make me happier than being the bad guy in GOOL.

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  4. Recap of my experience reading GOOL:

    WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

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  5. You make a good evil genius, N. Maybe it's time for a career change?

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  6. When does DS3M come in, wreaking havoc on everyone's lives, only to be found out as a robot sent by ________?

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  7. OMG, I think I know who the mysterious benefactor might be...

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