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Monday, February 7, 2011

The Narrator's Narratives: The Wrong Way

Hi, I’m The Narrator and this is my new post. Hey, Monsters are people too and they all have their story to tell. I’m here to be a medium that allows you to look in and see what monsters be doin’.

It is 8:00 AM and Frank Lloyd Wrong sits in front of his computer. His trusty companion Dog Lloyd Wrong on webcam to entertain lesser monsters.

His computer starts the warm feel of electricity surging though the keys, the shine of the screen hitting his face, these feelings he has felt time and time again, yet today it is different.

He knows today will be the day in a mere 30 minutes the posts will start and he will face his biggest challenge yet. While he has been known for some time to have both numerous and quality comments, this day he shall set a new standard for all great monsters.

He will release a comment barrage, that’s a barrage of comments.

He will not even rely on vague Lawblog references.

He will set shame to Videogum with the goal of 1 million up-votes.

Wettrew, Notsewfast, Patrick M and Mans will weep uncontrollably at the sight of his funny and thoughtful responses.

He has trained and tested his wit. No post shall leave him speechless. He will call upon his knowledge of all things from Pokémon to Gwyneth to reign supreme. Frank Lloyd Wrong holds in his hand the URLs to the greatest racist Marmaduke jokes that the world has ever seen.

It will go down as legend, the monster’s ball that he completely controlled. Top five comments, caption contest and editor’s choice will all be conquered this day by the Frank Lloyd Wrong. Hell, he may even throw out a tasteless abortion joke for lowest rated comment just for good measure.

While other monsters spend minutes, nay hours, nay days to think of single best new party game comment worthy of one minuscule up-vote. He will have no less than twenty #PeenMovies themed comments within the first ten comments.

Harry Balls and the Half-Blood Peen
PeenApple Express
Almost Penis
Peen and Glory
Apollo thirtpeen.
Pirates of the Caribpeen.
Saving Private Ryan (am I doing this right?)
King Dong
Peen It Forward
Jurassic Peen
Mission Impeenable
P for Peendetta
Lord of the Peen: The Fellowship of the Peen
Pretty in Peen
Peenet of the Apes
Dude, Where’s My Peen?
This is Peenal Tap
I Love You, Peen
Reality Bites Peen

In the world of Videogum, if Gabe is God and Steve Winwood is the Devil, then Frank Lloyd Wrong will be nothing less than Jesus.

Yes, today will be his day. Today is his Indepeendence Day.


  1. It's peenut butter jelly time! Peenut butter jelly time! #PeenMeme

  2. Very good, Narrator. The bomb has been disarmed and you'll receive the antedote tomorrow morning.